Strippin' Down

It was probably only the second week we lived here when we started hearing that Portland has a reputation for strip clubs. Apparently they're all the rage here in P-town (I forgot to mention that one in my nickname post.) We heard rumors of a pirate-themed strip club, a vegan strip club, even a karaoke strip club (a.k.a. stripparaoke). And, apparently the best steak in Portland is at Union Jack's. (One local resident told me this, although I highly doubt he conducted a scientific survey.)

I, personally, had never been to one before, but like they, say, "When in Rome..." so we went. Sorry, male readers. I do not have photos for you.... they really frown on that. Plus I was too busy grimacing through the $1 lap dance I got, which the "friends" we went with so graciously bought for me. I don't really have good stories to tell you about my experience. I mean, it was a strip club. There was a lot of nakedness, and a lot of cigarette smoke.

Anyway, it seems Portland's reputation is deserved. As of 2005 (the latest data I could find)Portland had more strip clubs per capita than anywhere else in the country, including Las Vegas AND San Francisco. At 7.4 strip clubs per 100,000 residents, Portland leaves Vegas and SF in the dust at only 5.8 and 2.2, respectively.

I did find out that there is, indeed a pirate-themed strip club, and a Vegan joint (whose slogan is "meat on the pole, not on the plate".) The karaoke strip club also exists, as does one specializing in sushi and a club for early risers ("we open for breakfast at 7am!")

Why on earth are there so many, you ask? I'm not really sure, but most things I've read suggest that Oregon's constitution protects strip clubs under the free speech clause, which is supposedly one of the most liberal in the country. Several attempts have been made to limit the clause, but every time it's on the ballot it gets voted down. I guess Portland likes their naked chicks.

So, if you like naked chicks, too, then come visit Portland and we'll keep you busy for a while.